You Don’t Have to Go it Alone

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I love the words of Anne Lamott, “My mind is a bad neighborhood that I try not to go into alone” (from Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son's First Year). As a psychotherapist by profession, it is my great privilege to accompany those with whom I work on a journey into their minds. Along the way, we encounter seeming ghouls of fear, pain, and anger. With patience and curiosity, we get to know these characters and ask them to tell their stories. More often than not, we come to discover that they are more like small children than monsters. As we travel on this journey together, the pain of the past is gradually healed. With healing through psychotherapy, people experience both greater well-being and peace of mind.

Interwoven in the process of healing the emotional injuries of the past, which all of us incur to one degree or another, is greater access to the self. In psychotherapy, the scope of the self is often delimited by the nervous system, that is, the brain and all the systems it oversees. Psychotherapy supports the integration of different aspects of the nervous system leading to a deeper experience of oneself as whole. Depending on the form of therapy and the interest of the client, the scope of the self is delimited beyond the physical body. In this case, the work of therapy brings the person in closer connection to their higher self, which extends from the body into the realm of spirit. There are forms of therapy and also spiritual counseling that incorporate God or a Higher Power. This connection with something greater, whether it’s the higher self, a Higher Power, and/or God, can lead to a greater sense of peace and can deepen wisdom and intuition.

The Self that A Course in Miracles teaches that we all are, is vastly more magnificent than the senses of self with which psychotherapy is concerned. And the immense healing of the mind that is possible also extends well beyond the usual scope of psychotherapy. What the Course teaches is that although we each think of ourselves as an individual, what we actually are is a “Oneness joined as One” (T-25.I.7), a Self greater than the universe itself. This Oneness beyond the awareness of individual consciousness is like the Atman of Hinduism and the one mind of Buddhism. It is no less than God. It is because this Self is all there is that we can experience all minds as joined, even while living in the world.

Few of us have had a direct experience of Oneness and most of us have a difficult time believing it is true. Instead, what we each believe and experience about ourselves, of course, is separateness—separate bodies, separate thoughts, separate histories, and separate interests. This belief in separation brings with it a great deal of fear (the reasons for which will be elaborated in later posts). It’s no wonder, then, that we resist looking at what is in our minds and the imagined horrors we expect to find there. But the Course provides enormous comfort. It teaches us that we never actually have to ‘go into the bad neighborhood of our minds alone.’ This is because there is an infinitely loving, wise, gentle, and kind presence in our minds alongside any fear.

This calm and loving presence is found in the quiet center. The way each of us turns towards this perfect peace and perfect love in our minds is going to be particular to each one of us. What is effective for many is to think of a deeply loving, peaceful being, like Jesus, Buddha, Muhammed, Mother Mary, or Guan Yin. When I first started reading the text of the Course and doing the Workbook Lessons, I practiced connecting with Jesus in my mind. After some years of doing this, it began to make more sense for me to connect with the Holy Spirit in my mind. Since we are all a “Oneness joined as one” (T-25.I.7:1), this is really just a matter of personal preference. For those who feel so moved, thinking of Spirit, the Holy Spirit, a Higher Power, or even majestic light or healing energy can be effective for connecting with the quiet center within. What is key, is that the peace and love we are seeking to connect with is not of this world. It is unlimited, it does not judge us, and it is available to us at any time, no matter what state of mind we are in. Despite whatever is happening outside ourselves or even within ourselves, we only have to pause a moment and turn towards this presence in our minds. We are never without help because we are never alone.


All quotes are from A Course in Miracles, copyright ©1992, 1999, 2007 by the Foundation for Inner Peace, 448 Ignacio Blvd., #306, Novato, CA 94949, www.acim.org and info@acim.org, used with permission.

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Falling in Love

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Living From the Quiet Center in a Pandemic